I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize