Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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