I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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