I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
My feet surprised me
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
