Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Randomize
