I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
