This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he thought i was a dude.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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