I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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