By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
