Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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