What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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