So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
