His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
