Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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