My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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