thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
