don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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