LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We have so much sex to catch up on
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm like, not good at living.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
