Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
