He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
