i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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