i think my tv is drunk
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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