The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
