i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Enjoy the penises
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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