i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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