Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'

Fav 18 886 3506
share tweet
(330): View more from Ohio

theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.

Fav 29 7252 1507
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(469): View more from Texas

I'm going through a really dark time right now

(214): View more from Texas

I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up

Fav 5 890 1831
share tweet
(319): View more from Iowa

Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??

Fav 4 847 730
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.

(816): View more from Missouri

Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?

Fav 2 1300 917
share tweet
(315): View more from New York

He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.

Fav 1 907 503
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(908): View more from New Jersey

best eviction party ever.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.

Fav 2 1071 595
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(603): View more from New Hampshire

We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday

Fav 1 76 20
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(937): View more from Ohio

She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.

Fav 0 39 10
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT