you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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