well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
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