4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Did I show you my penis last night?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
