smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
