I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
