its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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