my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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