I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize