would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
