I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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