The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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