FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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