I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
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