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I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
