it's like iHOP with fire
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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