Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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