yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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