I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
