Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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