He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
