y did u give ur computer a hand job?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
