Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
