I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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