i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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