If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
